MFT: Brian Cox Scotch Pronunciations

Do you remember that time when Orson Welles was so down and out that he was doing the commercials? Now it is part of the Welles' lore and fondly memefied in "The Critic" but it is rather sad period of life for The Great One. Among else it brought us stroke of genius remark "probably" and "frozen peas" meltdown. And there was also a long line of wine commercials in which are more famous for Welles going full-method wasted with every take. If only Dos Equis "The Most Interesting Man in the World" launch a couple of decades earlier... Anyway...



Sometimes big money suits try to do something that will not be blatant exploitation. This thing is one of such happy accidents. In this video you can see great Scottish actor Brian Cox pronouncing names of various types of scotch. So that you can order it adequately. That's the only thing he says throughout the entire 45-episode run. The series was produced by Esquire Magazine. Brian Cox looks a bit occupied in this series. He definitely gives negative amount of damn about the whole affair - just a job. You get that vibe and it breaks the whole thing. He's bored, apparently. Russell Jaffe would say he feels like Vader in WWF. I already have over hundred words here. Moving on next.

This series is a trifle nonce. It is a waste of Brian Cox' talent, there is no punchline to make it work. It is stretched out gag from "Kate and Leopold" where Hugh Jackman's character does a try-out for a commercial. No build-up, no pay-off. It is what it is - acclaimed actor pronouncing words. It means nothing. And that's why it is easy to spin.

Since i don't care about scotch - i perceive it as a piece of conceptual art. It is something as stupid simple as the very first video of HowToBasic where he just picked up an umbrella. You can't escape the feeling that there must be something. But there's nothing. There is glaring void behind it all. You can feel its presence. It is petrifying. Just a little bit. But it is nice thing to listen to on a shuffle. Especially if you are into doing something very pointless.

If you think about it - there many ways to make use of it. You can do a song out of it. Simple reciting of the titles. Kinda like Tom Lehrer's "The Elements". Or you can take the recording and mix them Steve Reich-like minimalist style - with looping, phasing, flanging mongolian cheek clap rampage. Or you can think about it just like that - it is better than thinking about your a) job b) family c) aspiring ambitions d)

Later Esquire did the same thing with Patrick Stewart pronouncing italian words (more like Patrick Stewart in-character as Captain Jean-Luc Picard pretending to be undercover as an actor who does educational videos) and it was nowhere near as great. Sir Patrick was really trying. It just wasn't right. That's not how you make dank feeng.