What kind of difficulties you experience while writing poetry?

One month ago i was asked "what kind of difficulties you experience while writing poetry?". It was business-as-usual question for the festival or something. The one where one could showboat the hell out of it and rumble tumble the hobbyhorse in the bout of conspicuous perspicacity.

In all seriousness, this question makes little to no sense from a practical standpoint. In terms of gatheting bunch of stuff - yeah, but there is little to no value in this kind of information. And there is not much to write home about. It is not that interesting to explore.

In fact, it is so casual you can't even ponder - yeah, happens, so what? I don't know, maybe because stopped caring about the whole poetry thing five years ago - so i have no sentiment towards such things. Or is it because it is not really an essential knowledge. Anyway, i was asked that question and i didn't wanted to phone it in.

So i started think how to answer this question and make a point.

First, let's count down some of the difficulties that happen while writing poetry:

• No paper / pen / pencil / note-taking app / mic at hand to document something
• Rikki don't lose that number situation
• the continuous drafting eliminates what made the original nugget so special
• the piece goes nowhere with no end in sight - you kinda enjoy doing it but it is ain't gonna work out
• writing the thing down makes the whole thing seem like a waste of effort
• memory fails to capture a momentary glimpse of an astounding image
• memory distorts the expression into something ordinary
• you think too much and it stops being fun
• it worked while you were in the moment, but now when the dust is settled - it is not that good at all
• words can't express the feeling you want to verbalize
• the narrative doesn't hold after being written down
• start fright - you can't start / make the first step
• feedback fright 
• you can't find a fitting ending to the piece because you think that Accept's Princess of the Dawn's abrupt ending kinda didn't worked.
• The meter doesn't add up.
• the poetic form of choice doesn't click with the content
• Can't find the word that sounds right 
• unable to piece together series of images or narrative strands into something cohesive

The list goes on. Do we really need musings about something like this? Of course, two times. Any pretentious dude will dash out a dozen of sentences about it like it was sneezing in the cardboard box in the midst of Bela Bartok listening party for one.

So how to make it count? I don't care about this thing at all and i have nothing to say but i want to take part in it - so what do i do?

First, the reason i don't care - because it doesn't make any difference. I got into poetry because i was interested in exploring the aesthetic qualities of language and the possibilities of making it different. I wasn't really in "spilling my guts" or something. But my efforts were either with hostility or dismissal and every time i tried to fit myself into a spot - it was to zero consequence. Why would try to fit in if there is literally no use of it. You don't get opportunities, you don't make friends, you pass time. At least playing Starcraft makes you fast on your wits, passing time with poets is dancing about architecture.

I've tried to be the part of ukrainian poetic community for a decade or so and it didn't worked out over and over again. These people can't stand me and i'm fine with it, they live in their little world which is very limited and narrow-minded - good for them, i'm having my own lunar park with blackjack and hookers.

Detour is over. Back to main topic. 

I decided to take a couple of steps back and reflect on the nature of things just like any poseur would do. Except i was honest.

Here's what i came up with.

1

The Gospel of Pink Fairies says, "Do It." And that's what you have to do. Period. Oddly enough, sometimes, on the spur of the moment and in the rattle of bliss - you forget about it and start to overthink the thing. It gets overwrought. While in of itself, there is nothing bad about overwrought overthinking - when it is not by design - it is detrimental to the cause. When you need to shoot - shoot not talk or hesitate.

From my perspective, the process of writing poetry is perfectly described by one Mike Tyson - "Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." Once you're in - you never know what's coming but you need to adapt and get through. You just do it, otherwise you crawl back into your warm bath of the comfort zone.

This makes writing poetry something Timothy Leary called "designing chaos." The challenge is to keep the composure to stay focused to delve into unknown unknown - and will the thing into existence. 

2

On the other hand, you have the baggage - skills, experience, opinions - this stuff often takes over and diminish your ability to stay open-minded and "make it new." 

It is like Psycho Mantis in Metal Gear Solid 1. It can counter your every step and predict every move and neuter the effort. So you need to reroute the controller to get over it. 

This aspect makes being a poet a rather dubious experience. You need to overcome your personality traits and be a stuntman double of yourself, more or less go in spite of an instinct, be wrong and helpless, and inane, and hapless to move further and explore new states - literally, stumble and bumble into discoveries and roll in it as if was a barb wire.

3

The challenge or difficulty of any kind may be a starting point or a building block of the piece; either way, it is what makes the piece special. 

When it happens - you're on the right track. So in retrospect, the answer is, "bring it on." 

In that regard, in one way or another, the poet semi-unknowingly looks for the challenge or trouble or difficulty or complication by nature with no apparent intention to leverage it. As a fellah once sang, "misery's my middle name." It just happens.

It is natural to look for tomato can challenges to get through, because taking risks can get you beat and you don't want that fuzzy feeling. 

And the whole thing is encapsulated in one sharp "ok.", possibly followed by "whatever", that results in moving on towards the solution that realizes the piece. 

***
To summarize, the challenges are:

• needless overthinking
• purposeful overconfidence
• sheer lack of adaptability
• blatant lack of openmindedness
• abhorrent lack of focus
• eldritch fear of unknown
• mischievous comfort zone corruption
• calamitous fear of failure 
• nonplus lack failure positivity